just thought i'd come in and write a few words about life and how sometimes it just seems to get you down. There are so many things going on in the world right now that one wonders why it just keeps going and then you see a child smile and you know the answer. But it doesn't always allow you to actually feel the hope that you know is there, the rainbow that always follows the storm or the heat from the spring's sunlight after a cold dark winter. That is what happens when your body is just not is a good healthy space. It is so frustrating to want to do things, you have a passion but all you can do is dream, pain corrupts the very heart of your life and there is nothing you can do but endure. That is what my life feels like right now. i have been searching for three years for a job but because of my physical issues that the doctor's cant seem to identify and or diagnose no one will hire me. and also because of this hesitation from doctor's i am not eligible for disability. my husband strives to pay all the bills with his meager income and i know that it is depressing for him to have to do it alone but my hands are tied. i do what i can to help stretch the dollars and earn more.... i do my pottery because i love it but also because i know my own limits and i can set and stick to them without being fired, but getting the business off the ground without any money is a very difficult thing to do. i will continue though because that is who i am. i am bone tired and body heavy. i hurt more often than not and i am grumpy and irritable. i try to hide as much of this as i can but i know it leaks out. my husband is so dear to me for his understanding and love, he truly is a wonderful man! and i am blessed to have him in my life! i just wish i could do more....
